Thursday, February 3, 2011

What I Wished Someone Told Me About Dating

This post is written in response to Bonnie Gray's Faith Barista Jam on the topic of dating...

I’m headed towards the dreaded curve for the second time this week. It twists and curls itself around the building up to the menu box. “Welcome to McDonalds,” the lady exclaims. I drive away with three My Little Pony Hamburger Happy Meals…again.

I place the meals on the passenger’s side. As the French fry smell tickles the edge of my nose, I can’t resist-- I must have a fry! I begin fiddling with the box. I yank out several fries. One of them is so crunchy, it about chips my tooth! And girl, I’ve had braces twice, and a chipped tooth is not okay!

You may be wondering, “What in heaven’s name does this have to do with dating?” Well, as I sit alone crunching on a burned French fry, I begin thinking of the topic of dating.

This is what I came up with:

Guys are like McDonald’s French fries. So profound, isn’t it?

They can be crunchy, hard, stale, soft, over-done, short, or tall. Sometimes they look good on the outside but the taste isn’t what you expected.

My personal dating experiences were a lot like those fries. They looked like the real thing, but they were imitators. They were phonies trying to pass themselves off as the ultimate guy. They imitated the world, not God (See Ephesians 5:1)—and it showed. Several red flags and a lot of broken hearts later, I figured that out.

God has given you one face, and you make yourself another. ~William Shakespeare

God has given me a wonderful husband and three little girls. If I were talking to my babygirls right now, I would say, “People are not always what they seem—be on guard.” I wish someone had told me.

I wish someone had told me…
Dating isn’t always fun;
Your door may not always be held open;
Your date may think fishing is more important;
Abusive relationships are hard to walk away from;
People may try to change me; and
How much betrayal hurts.

I went through a lot of stale fries before getting to the good one. Do you know why? I tried filling the lonely places with relationships instead of God. Those places crying out when there’s no prom date, the places longing for dinner and a movie, the places desiring to be held for no particular reason. These are places that can only be filled by the One who created our hearts and understands them.

I wish someone had told me the waiting would be hard.

Dating is a battlefield.

We Jesus girls must take spiritual inventory before entering the trenches of dating. We must ask ourselves, “Are we serving the “Kingdom of Me” or are we honoring the “Kingdom of God” in our dating choices?

Just like that hamburger Happy Meal, dating can either be stale and empty or fresh and satisfying!

Best Pick Up Line Comebacks:“Single and Content,” Word Publishing, 1999

Your body is like a Temple.
Sorry, there are no services today.

Hey baby, what’s your sign?

I want to give myself to you.
Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts.

I can tell you want me.
Yes, I want you to leave.

May I have the last dance?
You’ve just had it.



  1. This is a great post! It made me laugh so hard! But honestly it is so true. Dating is hard! As Jesus girls, we need to find our worth in Christ before even considering looking at dating. Thanks for this great post!

  2. LOVE the french fry analogy! How true is that?! I also went through way too many stale fries...reached the bottom of the bag, you know, the one that had been in the car for 6 months?
    But God did bless me with a wonderful hubby too!
    LOVE the funny! I may even share them with our youth group :-)

  3. Getting a date was never hard for me what was hard was the emotions of getting to know that person. Dating has to many challenges and I learned to just be content in being single. Now that I am happily married woman I feel for those who are still out here dating. It is harder now then it was then. To many issues and way to many games. I tell single men and women all the time be content with being single and when you are ready God will let you know, it's time for a mate. Men and women rush into dating all out of being alone and then to find out the person who they are dating is not the one for them. I guess it all comes down to is wait on GOD

  4. Love your pick up line come backs!! TOO funny!! Man, I could have used those "back in the day"!!
    Thanks for stopping in and leaving a message - you were right - it has been several weeks (months?) since I'd blogged. It's been a rough winter for me with a new diagnosis of asthma, and I spent a lot of time on BED REST. How much energy could writing take? Too much during that season. I'm not out of the woods, but God's got my attention and I'll let Him do my battling for me...
    be blessed blogging friend...

  5. “Are we serving the “Kingdom of Me” or are we honoring the “Kingdom of God” in our dating choices?" We need to ask this question in everything we do. I want to serve the kingdom of God!

  6. Can so relate to this "I went through a lot of stale fries before getting to the good one. Do you know why? I tried filling the lonely places with relationships instead of God."

    My choices stemmed from insecurity and fear. The only One meant to truly satisfy us and fill that lonely place is Christ. Once I stopped settling and comprising...Christ showed me He is more than able to satisfy me!

  7. "Dating is a battle field!" And, today it's an even scarier place to be... I'm SO glad I'm not on it... Praise Jesus!

  8. I agree with you that dating definitely can be hard! Glad you found that just-right fry. :-) God is good.

  9. Great analogy! I think McDonald's will forever be changed for me. :) And you're right---waiting is so very hard at times. Great post!

  10. haha! i love it! and i agree...the waiting is hard...

  11. Kelli, while I'm obviously not a "Jesus Girl", I suffered through the dating years from a man's perspective but with similar issues. LOL Had I the relationship with God I do now back then, I'm sure it would have been a completely different experience. Thankfully, God eventually led me to a wonderful lady to share my life with, so all those hard-learned lessons were very much worthwhile in the end.

    Thank you for a wonderful post and the smile!

    Have a Blessed Day!

  12. LOL Love it! May i say I'm sending it to my oldest daughter,, sigh......I am praying she get a fresh perfect, not to salty, not to stale fry right off the bat, but then again would we know it was good if we had never tasted the bad? hmmmm.... if it was a God thing, I bet we would! thanks for this interesting view,, Loved it! -Dawna

  13. Awesome post and sooo true! Thanks for sharing this! Funny, the topic of dating has been on my mind lately. Maybe because I have a 14 1/2 year old and that could be on the horizon sometime soon. It would so us so much good to tell our children the truths about dating.

    Please feel free to stop by: Trailing After God

  14. I never thought of guys like McDonald's French Fries. And you know what? You just made me extremely hungry. LOL.

  15. Oh, Kelli! You are hilarious! You make me laugh so hard. And on your comment at (In)Courage too! ... that's right char marks to dust off .. and some french fries too! (btw, I was just at McD's yesterday with my boys.. Tonka trucks, with microscopic stickers.. arrggh! LOL)

    Anwayz, seriously, you are so fun to be with and such an encouraging friend. Love the analogy.

    By the way, I read your comment over at Dunlizzie and it was so neat to hear your personal journey to find love and what you had to go through. Such beauty and glory. now, I know why your heart is so beautiful. Thanks for keeping the light on for me here. ;)

  16. Those comebacks are so hilarious!!! :D I was dying laughing. thank you so much! I'm glad I read this blog. ~Velvet