My husband warned me that 2010 would be a challenging year for us. He was right. At first it was a little gradual rocking of our boat, but we seemed to manage pretty well. But over the last few months the tumultuous seas quickly took us from bad to worse.
I confess. I’m tired. Dark circles have deeply etched themselves in under my eyes. A few extra pounds have made their home in all the wrong places. And last week I lost my ability to stay above the incessant crashing waves.
It never fails; when I get like this the rants of my flesh seem to target and force themselves upon my weakened soul. I selfishly evaluate my complaints. Pride festers. I carefully weigh my rights. Entitlement sets in. And at a time when my responses are completely crucial to our stability they became dangerously destructive.
This weekend it all came to a thunderous head. My husband and I had what Lysa Terkheurst would call a “growth opportunity,” that’s positive talk for a verbal throw-down. It wasn’t pretty. But despite me,
I think sometimes we have to make the wrong choices to clearly see the right ones. As soon as my purpose fell under the attack of unwanted busy-ness and unruly fleshy-ness I got the Spiritual sense knocked out of me. And only after I began to hear myself speak did the Spirit allow me to recall just what it was that I had lost sight of: God’s purpose.
I am His.
“He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10 (NLT)
My troubles began when I took my eyes off of Holy and Righteous Him and started to worry about poor and pitiful me. He created me for His pleasure and His purposes.
I am a wife.
“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.” Ephesians 3:22 (NIV)
I am to submit and support my husband no matter what our circumstances are. Regardless of his decisions or how hard it all is. I am to sit content under his authority with complete trust and respect for him as if he were the Lord himself.
And, I am a mom.
“Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6 (NIV)
My children are always watching. And especially when I am following the whims of my flesh they are soaking it all in. I am their example of how to love and serve their earthly father and their Spiritual Father. He’s entrusted me with this awesome responsibility.
Truth is I have no purpose outside of His plans. His purpose is solid. Unchangeable. Unaffected by the devouring waves of a raging storm. When I’m steering the boat in my own strength and set on my own course the surging sea will surely swallow me up, but when He is my compass and my anchor my soul is unshaken by the dark and deadly waters.
Can you relate? Have you ever lost sight of His purpose for your life? How did He get your attention?